It's early in the morning and i can't sleep, went to bed at bout 9.30 with a splittin headache and woke up at bout 2 just like that, had to go turn on my tv..i guess i have alot on my mind and alot of weight in my heart...nothing feels right at the moment, but i try to bury myself in the books and take my mind off things cause when i find myself doing nothing i become overwhelmed with emotions and the pain comes back just like it did that night...but we're all a surviver in our own way and things sometimes look worse than they really are...however it feels as tho i have no control over anything anymore and i just wish i could sleep through most of this, wake up and it'll be over..

*again: wishful thinking*